Zach Miller (zarfmouse) wrote,
Zach Miller

cabinet meme from the_sween

President: zarfmouse

Vice President: duck2ducks - Who else could I trust with this position? We'll make a great team. I expect many late night conversations about the direction we'll be taking the nation.

President's Chief of Staff: mfeltes83 - This is probably going to be the hardest job in my cabinet. You'll have to keep my flaky self and all my hippie friends organized. I'll trust you to give me some realistic perspective when my plans for the nation go too far overboard.

Secretary of Agriculture: herbivorous - We're going to ensure that we have a viable food supply for the entire nation that is locally grown. No more monoculture. Organic food for all! Also I'm giving the FDA to you, I expect you to work closely with Health and Human Services on a wholistic health program.

Secretary of Commerce: ryanfirewitch - Fair trade is the name of the game. I trust you can manage it.

Secretary of Defense: assclouds - Don't let those generals give you any guff. Use the Angry Jay on them. We're cutting your funding by a lot, at least 60%. I trust you to find useful ways to recycle all that shit your armies have got laying around for peaceful benefit because you can't keep it anymore. This will be a strictly defensive force. Angry Jay will also be useful when and if the Department of Peace fails.

Secretary of Education: boldmoves - I honestly don't have a grand plan for education at the federal level. I expect you to be visionary about this. We definitely need to encourage the states to fund education from income taxes rather than local property taxes. Also, no more unfunded mandates. I'd like to see every citizen have the right to a free college education. We'll tax the rich for this.

Secretary of Energy: mollisol - You get 20% of the funds that we take from Defense to support massive research into Solar, Wind, and Geothermal. Then we'll figure out how to roll it out everywhere. You'll also get money from a big tax on oil imports.

Secretary of Health & Human Services: the_sween - You will also be in charge of the new Single Payer Universal Health Care program. We'll pay for that with a payroll tax.

Department of Homeland Security: REDACTED. All agencies returned to their former departments.

Secretary of Housing & Urban Development: sarpo - Major funding for public art EVERYWHERE. Especial focus on funding locally created public art in economically depressed communities, both urban and rural. I'm giving you 5% of what we take away from Defense specifically for this purpose. I'll also transfer 90% of the current federal prisons budget over to you for more and better and more humane low income housing.

Secretary of the Interior: kakistocracy - First thing is find all that missing Indian money and give it back to them. Then we're disolving the Bureau of Indian Affairs and putting tribal relations under the State department where they belong. After that, just keep the public lands nice and public.

Attorney General (Department of Justice): boannan - You know what needs to be done. You have my full support. We're going to have to pardon a LOT of people, so you might want to start on the paperwork now.

Secretary of Labor: dsjones - First order of business is tripling the minimum wage, then we nationalize Walmart. Also better unemployment benefits.

Secretary of State: deaconobvious - If there's anyone that can find common ground with friends and foes alike, it's you. We're going to start being nice to everyone, let them know and help them trust in it.

Secretary of Transportation: arun251 - Critical Mass will be declared a national (monthly) holiday. Major federal funding for multi-modal transportation hubs (and bike accessibility on all public transportation), bike paths, light rail, and a high speed long distance rail system with at least as much coverage as the interstate highway system. At least 25% of the money cut out of the Defense budget will go here.

Secretary of the Treasury: kimmitt - Someone has to keep the capitalist system running until we finish disolving it and I can think of no more qualified friend.

Secretary of Veterans Affairs: logodaedaly - A progressive friend who has respect for the military. Very important!

Office of National Drug Control Policy: revjack - Let's stop putting people in jail.

Environmental Protection Agency Director: lidora - I know you'd fight those polluting corporations tenaciously and I'd make sure you had the teeth to do it with REAL fines and the threat of instituting the corporate death penalty.

United States Trade Representative: kateorama - A good mediator and a good communicator. You'll be charged with breaking the news that we're backing out of NAFTA, WTO, FTAA, and all other multi-lateral trade agreements and negotiating bilateral treaties that protect the environment and worker's rights.

Department of Folk Music: goovie - Charged with preserving the tradition. Project Troubador: We'll use a network of subsidized (free folk shows for everyone!) touring solo acoustic performers as a national communication infrastructure. They'll report back to us on the state of the nation, better than any polls.

Department of Peace: cassiopia - I hate to copycat but this department does need to get created (heck there's been a bill in congress to create it for years) and you ARE perfect for the job. You get 50% of what we take away from Defense.

Department of Techno-democracy: uss_hairball - We're really going to bridge the digital divide for all citizens. Public access to high speed internet for all, and information literacy training for everybody. Through your helpdesk work I hope you have enough experience with folks to help make this stuff truly accessible.
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