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"Nobody in the world is as cool as Pink Floyd" - The Life and Thoughts of Zach

Dec. 13th, 2003

02:34 am - "Nobody in the world is as cool as Pink Floyd"

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And I thought my .sig made me look like a dork. I just read a letter (actual paper letter, not email) that I sent to someone in the summer of 1994. Wow. Really. Dorky. I'd hoped maybe by the summer before my Senior year the extreme dorkiness had subsided a little bit. I'm so glad my peers were all just as dorky and awkward as I was.

Makes me wonder if I ever really got over it, or if deep down inside I'm just as dorky.

Comments:

From:(Anonymous)
Date:December 13th, 2003 02:19 am (UTC)

Maybe it's my standards...

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I don't think you were *that* dorky.
But you were dorky in a cute way so it's ok. (-:,
Rose
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From:zarfmouse
Date:December 13th, 2003 10:59 am (UTC)

Re: Maybe it's my standards...

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Neither did I. I think it's all about slow change. Everything about any given person slowly grows out of the clueless awkward person that they were when they were in high school. Everyone else in high school is in the same boat so no one really notices. You have to go back a decade later to realize that you have in fact changed a bit.
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From:zarfmouse
Date:December 13th, 2003 11:00 am (UTC)

Re: Maybe it's my standards...

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When I said "grows out" I meant "grows from" not "grows away from". Which is to say, that inner dorkiness is still certainly foundational to my personality. And I dig it.
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From:zarfmouse
Date:December 13th, 2003 11:13 am (UTC)

Re: Maybe it's my standards...

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It's particularly intriguing that throughout my life I always assume that any kind of unexpected advance is a joke. In this letter I assumed the spielsache thing was a joke. Later in life I'd assume the J/M birthday threesome offer was a joke. I always assume that girls are making fun of me rather than wanting me.
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From:aethyric
Date:December 13th, 2003 09:01 am (UTC)
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dorkitude is foundational and merely gets layered over with interesting Stuff as the years go by. deep down dorkiness softens and weathers with time, loses it's gawky awkwardness, becomes endearing to those around you, keeps one curious and young in many ways.

or maybe i'm just making this up because i know i have class-passed-notes somewhere that discuss how mary and i would be the only people in the school able to defend against a draconian attack were it to actually occur. ;)

*shake head*
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From:zarfmouse
Date:December 13th, 2003 11:02 am (UTC)
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Hell yah. You were my kind of cool dork kid. :)

I'm very proud of my dorky foundation and I know I'm still that kid with a few layers of learned social filters and empathy and experience thrown on the top. It's just shocking to face it's raw form a decade later.
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From:culfinglin
Date:December 13th, 2003 09:44 am (UTC)
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remember the crucial difference between 'dork', 'nerd', and 'geek'. i maintain that it's far better to be a geek than a dork, and so long as you get paid for doing things with your vast stores of arcane knowledge, you're a geek. so don't worry. you're not a dork. you're a geek. :)
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From:zarfmouse
Date:December 13th, 2003 11:09 am (UTC)
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See though, this is the dorkiness of telling really really bad in-jokes that the recipient was certain to not get or care about. This is the dorkiness of mimicking other "cool" peers of mine because I myself had no idea how to be cool. This is the dorkiness of a kid who tries to be fake silly intellectual but is SO not intellectual that it comes off dumb.

(Though there are several paragraphs about the fact that I would spend 78 hours working on building my high school's Unix infrastructure (configuring 3 Sparc 20s, a power mac server, a pentium server, and an old Sun 4/110 to all work together) that week. So yah I was ALSO a Big Geek. Which I'm quite proud of. The dorky part was talking about all that in a letter which was ostensibly a gawky pickup attempt (which ultimately succeeded, so go geek power)).
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From:boannan
Date:December 13th, 2003 11:24 am (UTC)
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direct geekiness gets the goods!
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From:(Anonymous)
Date:December 13th, 2003 01:10 pm (UTC)

Oh Zach...

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Stop talking about UNIX. You're making me hot.
(-:,
Rose
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From:zarfmouse
Date:December 13th, 2003 01:56 pm (UTC)

Re: Oh Zach...

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:P
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From:folkyboy
Date:December 13th, 2003 11:36 am (UTC)
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isn't it the prerequisite that we're all dorks in high school?
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From:zarfmouse
Date:December 13th, 2003 11:55 am (UTC)
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Oh, absolutely. It's just shocking (and interesting) to confront. :)

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From:marezcharz
Date:December 13th, 2003 12:35 pm (UTC)
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No matter what, Pink Floyd is still the shit. (not that there aren't many others that aren't).

I'm so old, the only computer learrning in our high school was a tiny, tiny bit of BASIC. Old 5.5 floppy drives, the kind where it was certain death for the entire computer if you shut it down in the wrong sequence. Also, they didn't have computers for my graphic design classes in college. Ever hear of zipatone? Yeesh!
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From:zarfmouse
Date:December 13th, 2003 12:40 pm (UTC)
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Well at my hometown high school there wasn't much better than BASIC either because they had no money and their computers were old. The high school with the Unix stuff was kind of a magnet school and I happened to be there during this magic time period where all the technical staff quit and the students jumped in and ran the entire network basically by ourselves (with the aid of an alumni who came back for a couple years to help while they were understaffed).

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