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Single Again - The Life and Thoughts of Zach

May. 5th, 2003

06:28 pm - Single Again

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Well. I'm single again. Not much more to say, it wasn't working out, but ya know...thats the kind of thing people want updates about.

(Of course it's horribly more complex than that, hearts were broken, tears were cried, guts were wrenched, but I'm not really wanting to document it all here.)

I feel like a jerk. I know I did the right thing. I'm relieved. I feel like a jerk.

Comments:

From:in_the_end_hope
Date:May 5th, 2003 05:26 pm (UTC)
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wanna join the "we broke hearts but it was for a good cause" club?
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From:zarfmouse
Date:May 5th, 2003 05:33 pm (UTC)
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As an incentive, after breaking 3 hearts in my lifetime, can I get a "get out of feeling like a jerk free card"? I need one of those.

(This randomly surfing friends of friends and adding interesting ones as my friend thing really works fast!)

Anyway, consider me a member!

I swear there's something in the air lately. I mentioned to someone that I was breaking up and he said "yah, I did that yesterday". And several other friends have had similar things happen. Perhaps we need to call the EPA.
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From:in_the_end_hope
Date:May 5th, 2003 05:35 pm (UTC)

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if you deserve a "get out of feeling like a jerk free" card, i deserve a fucking halo for what i did, so you are MORE THAN WELCOME to join up.

we don't have any cool badges or anything though...

also, zach, it's faith. hi.
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From:zarfmouse
Date:May 5th, 2003 05:47 pm (UTC)
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The world is so weird. I'm reading my friends page and Jerry posts his soundtrack of his life list and credits (among others) you and zoe and I think "hey zoe and faith have LJs, I should find them and add them to my friends list". So I look at Jerry's friends and try to figure out which are you and Zoe, find Zoe, and then while looking for you find juvenilia (juvenilia) which I think is you and this "natasha" who is friends with Zoe, Jerry (desert_fox, AND Don (duck2ducks. And I think "I've got to find out who this person is...how weird that someone would be friends with Zoe AND Don". Only after you posted here did I realize that you were ALSO Faith.

The internet is such a strange damned place.
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From:in_the_end_hope
Date:May 5th, 2003 05:48 pm (UTC)

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hahaha. yes it is a strange place.

i actually have 3 of these. one that i use and 2 that i don't.

that was back when they were free and easy to use.

i did not know you knew jerry and don, though.

strange place indeed.
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From:zarfmouse
Date:May 5th, 2003 05:54 pm (UTC)
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Don and I have been best friends since High School. Jerry plays in Arun's band and Arun is another best friend since high school. Jerry is also friends with my other best friend since like first grade, Robb (rolandkale).

How do you know Don?

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From:in_the_end_hope
Date:May 5th, 2003 05:55 pm (UTC)

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i know don through livejournal and jerry. he and i used to write haikus to each other while at work when i lived in california. never met him, hear he's short. :)

as for jerry, i met him at target when i worked there, and met ron through him when they lived together on vine st.
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From:cloeigrrl
Date:May 5th, 2003 08:33 pm (UTC)
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*hugs*

welcome to my world
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From:zarfmouse
Date:May 5th, 2003 09:07 pm (UTC)
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at least we're all in this world together.
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From:superlemming13
Date:May 6th, 2003 01:02 am (UTC)

We've got your back, Zach.

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Zach, for a long time now, we've kind of been comfortable acquaintances with each other. And in all the time that I've known you, you've been a stand up guy with a good head on your shoulders. If breaking up was something that you know was the right thing to do, then I know that you did indeed make the right decision. Sometimes doing the right thing hurts, but it's better than the alternative. Anyway, you've got friends, and I guess, having gone through this before, you know that it'll get better in time. Keep your chin up.
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From:goytoy
Date:May 6th, 2003 11:23 am (UTC)

LJ weirdness

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Speaking of weird LJ things - I did that little trick where you see who out there in the either shares the most interests w/ you. You were my #2 choice so I decided to check out your journal. Hope you don't mind - I've enjoyed some of your insights.

p.s. I'm not trying to hit on you , as I am married. I just realized thiscomment may come across as suspicious given your original message.

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From:zarfmouse
Date:May 6th, 2003 12:17 pm (UTC)

Re: LJ weirdness

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Heh. Welcome my friend! I'll add you to my friends list! Anyone who loves Adam Brodsky is ok by me. (I've done the same thing with a number of people who came up highly matched against my interests. I think this is not out of the ordinary for LJ users since a number of those people have silently added me back.)

This is such a wonderfully social thread for such a downer of a report. Thanks everyone!
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From:goytoy
Date:May 6th, 2003 01:12 pm (UTC)

Lovin' the dork

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Yeah, Adam is really cool, both musically and personally. He played a show at our house last year, and when he was in Madison he actually came by and sang for my sister and her brand-new baby, as she obviously wasn't able to make it to the show. A real mensch and one of the few artists out there who seems to have improved with every album.
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From:zarfmouse
Date:May 6th, 2003 01:20 pm (UTC)

Re: Lovin' the dork

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I book folk music shows at our local Independent Media Center and Adam has played here like 4 or 5 times now. He's always one of the nicest, easiest to deal with musicians that we have. A friend of mine and I actually drove out to Philly specifically to see his CD release party for Hookers, Hicks, and Heebs. It was amazing, he had like 30 of his musician friends from Philly (and elsewhere) come and cover his tunes on stage one by one and then he did a set at the end. One of the coolest, cutting to the true heart of folk music culture, events I've been to. Totally worth the 14 hour drive.

Now, if only I could convince more than 10 people from the local populace to come to his show on any given evening, my life would be set.
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From:goytoy
Date:May 6th, 2003 01:30 pm (UTC)

Re: Lovin' the dork

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Pretty cool! Yeah, Greg from Rochester is supposed to be sending me a copy of that show at some point. We were hosting Hamell on Trial that night so we couldn't make it down. If you're interested, I can send you a copy of the show he did at our house. It sounds great. I've also got copies of some private shows w/ Hamell on Trial and Mary Prankster, if you like that stuff.

We had the show w/ Adam for the very reason you mentioned. We first saw him in Philly w/ big crowds and were amazed to see him draw only a few people when he showed up here. We didn't charge any cover, so it wasn't your typical "house concert" and we invited all of our friends and had free food and drinks, plus a musician/friend played an opening set (for fun and also to draw a bigger crowd.) Of course, once people see Adam they want to see him again (well, except for one friend's snarky girlfriend, but then, she hates everything.)
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From:zarfmouse
Date:May 6th, 2003 01:46 pm (UTC)

Re: Lovin' the dork

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How much does Hammel generall charge/expect to make? I've been really wanting to book him but I didn't know if an Ani opener such as himself was too expensive for my small volunteer operated venue or not...
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From:goytoy
Date:May 6th, 2003 02:14 pm (UTC)

Hamell's fees

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As far as Ed goes - it's hard for me to say because we are sort of friends. (I mean, he doesn't invite us to his kids' birthday party, but he does things like get us tickets to shows, so that's why I say "kind of.")He played at Neil's 30th BD party and also at his PhD party few years later and charged us only $500 each time (though we gave him more.) I suspect that he gets much more now that he's taken off, but I'm afraid to ask. Our stuff was for private parties and so I'm sure he took pity on us. He's a great guy so if you emailed him I'm sure he'd talk w/ you about working something out. If you were willing to work w/i his schedule he might be more accomodating.

Mary, on the other hand (her real name is Samantha but she basically goes by Mary now) is a nice person but her management is much less pleasant to deal w/ (I think perhaps as she comes from more of a rock background.) If Neil wasn't such a fan I would probably not have booked her as we wound up paying her $400 for an opening set.
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From:zarfmouse
Date:May 6th, 2003 02:49 pm (UTC)

Re: Hamell's fees

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Cool thanks for the tips.
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From:zarfmouse
Date:May 6th, 2003 01:53 pm (UTC)

Re: Lovin' the dork

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Oh and I'd love to trade recordings with you of any Adam or Hammel stuff. I actually don't know Mary Prankster...I guess I should check that out.

I've got a bunch of recordings from our recent season of shows but I haven't processed them yet. I'd be happy to send you some once I process them if they turn out ok (Alix Olson, Doria Roberts, Vicki Salz, Beth Amsel, Brian Webb, and a bunch of locals). I also have a bunch of old Ani boots from back when I was trading those.

Anyway, if you go to my user profile and click on my home page and then go to my "biographical and contact information" page you can find my home address. I will gladly accept anything you send to me and will send you stuff in return. :)
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From:goytoy
Date:May 6th, 2003 02:07 pm (UTC)

Re: Lovin' the dork

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Will do! My husband has the burner on his computer and he's madly finishing up a paper for a conference, but I'll get on it. Mary is great. Her recordings are w/ a full band (well, two other guys, anyway) but she broke up the band and has been touring as an acoustic act recently. Very clever lyrics, w/ a wide range of influences. I hired her and Ed Hamell to play my husband's PhD party (why go halfway, right?) so I can just send it and if you don't like it, don't worry. (I suspect you will, though.)
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From:goytoy
Date:May 6th, 2003 01:23 pm (UTC)

Of course, I meant "ether," not "either."

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I can spell, honest - I just can't type accurately.
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From:bolo
Date:May 7th, 2003 08:35 am (UTC)

You go with your bad self...

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Knowing what you've told me so far a week ago, it sounds like you did the right thing. You've even said as much. The jerk feeling will pass in time...ya jerk.

Of course seeing so many comments numbered at the bottom of your entry amused me. I got to thinking, geez, he really must have pissed off his friends or something.

Then I read the thread of comments and by the time I had gotten to Faith and Don's little conversation, I'd forgotten what started this whole chain of comments.
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From:zarfmouse
Date:May 7th, 2003 09:50 am (UTC)

Re: You go with your bad self...

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And you have the honor of being the _only_ person I talked to about this before the night before I decided to breakup. It's nice to have a friend off in AZ who has NO idea about the context of my life and NO interaction with the people in my town. A very handy reference point for exploring otherwise unthinkable thoughts.
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From:mr_ducktape
Date:May 8th, 2003 05:32 pm (UTC)
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Our conversations will do that.
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From:marezcharz
Date:May 14th, 2003 04:30 am (UTC)

Could there BE anymore comments?

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Wow, misery does love company. 67 comments. Funny that's how we all got here, but the conversation never seems to stay on the negative. I think that says a lot about you and your friends. Keep being your cool self - ya jerk!
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